WHY I CHOSE HER

Valentine is almost here! The season of love; everyone is talking about it, love bells are ringing; the time when true love and friendship is tested. Some partners see it as the perfect time to give the best sex to their spouses. Expectations increase on both parties for gifts and surprises. Lovers are re-united and becoming closer; a time to show the world how proud you are of your loved one. It is so romantic when a gentleman asks a lady “baby, will you be my Val?”

I had a chat with some gentlemen to take statistics on the qualities that makes a man want to be with a lady. These were their
responses:

What are the physical and spiritual qualities you will like to see in a lady that will make you want to be with her?

Frederick (name withheld):  She should have a beautiful look from afar, six figure, a height that complements my height, not slim, not fat but average, size 32 to 36 breast size, a good hip, a nice dressing that can turn one on, a good and praying Christian, a mission and vision driven lady, a team player, not stubborn or selfish, carrying the Holy Spirit, a caring one that attends to one's needs at the expense of her own, a woman to support him when he is downcast.

Nnanna (name withheld): Good shape, hour-glass shape with sharp curves, sizable burst, good size of hips, tall, dark, flat belly, good communicator, neat, entrepreneur, creative in all aspect, team player, good smiles, good set of teeth and eyes, friendly, clean-cut difference between waist and hips like 28 to 40, God-fearing, gifts of the Holy Spirit, vision, tongue and interpretation, prays well, spiritually inclined.

Donald (name withheld): Being playful, bravery, good dressing, beauty, excited about life, a sense of humor, girl who knows how to move her body, active in dancing, smelling nice, not much make up, intelligent, good communication skill, good body type, kind, not selfish, teeth and lips well set, respectful, managing the little she has and putting it on well.

Daniel (name withheld): Down to earth, not materialistic, beautiful, good height, it will be nice if she is more prayerful than I am.

Ovie (name withheld): Good character, caring, presentable, God-fearing, supportive, tall, smart, must be able to express herself in public, good shape, straight legs, flat stomach, nice lips, good set of teeth.

What kind of orientation did your parents and teachers give you concerning relationship when you were younger?

Frederick: Don’t date a lady except you want to marry her.

Nnanna: I was told not to keep a girlfriend and never did any of them tell me how to handle relationships. The point is that our parents believe every relationship is sex related. They never cared about sex/relationship education.

Donald: My parents don’t talk to us about relationship, but you are free to date at the university and come home with the girl. If my parents like the girl, they will ask me if I love her and if I say yes, she is my wife and they will treat her like my sister and even sponsor her education.

Daniel: Honestly, I have never spoken with my parents before on any topic relating to girls.

Ovie: Well, in my family, we really don’t get into relationships so early.

What is your opinion about dating a virgin?

Frederick: A perfect option. It brings trust and security into a relationship. If your babe goes out, you are sure she is not having sex with someone else. You can sleep off 100%.

Nnanna: Dating a virgin is a good one. Can you tell which one is? I was meant to understand that it comes with a blessing. Some will say they don’t want to be with a virgin. I know of a friend who says she wants to have plenty of sex before marriage, nobody told me to run for my dear life. Surely if a virgin comes my way, I will embrace her with my two hands wide opened. If she lost it before, and got God DNA running in her, she definitely got her virginity back, because old things are passed away, and all things are new.

Donald: Virginity does not really matter, what matters is love and understanding. But for a virgin, I guess everyone dream of that. Life nowadays is something else. It is really luck to see a virgin and it is supposed to be the best. The relationship is 100% secured.

Daniel: As long as the character and attitude is right, I don’t really care much if she's a virgin or not.

Ovie: I have always loved to date a virgin but am not the lucky type. I respect virgins and if I had a virgin for a partner, I would worship her for the rest of my life. For I see them more precious and valuable than gold.

Having listened to all of them, I realized that they all have something they want to see that goes beyond beauty and physical appearance. A wise woman builds her house but with her hands, the foolish one tears hers down. (Proverbs 14:1).

“Men don't feed on beauty anymore but an excellent character, an excellent spirit and a compatible woman” – Chimdimma Gabriel Uche